As I was reading before bed, I heard a loud commotion coming from the hallway. I jumped off my bed and ran out to see what was going on. Multiple guys were out in the hallway yelling profanity and showing a ton of emotion. I approached one of the more vocal ones and asked what was going on.
He yelled, "he killed him? I can't believe he killed him!"
I was terrified that someone truly had been killed in someones room. Confused, I yelled at the group of guys, "who killed who, what are you talking about?" By now, other inmates had come into the hallway just as upset as the others and I quickly realized that I was the only one who didn't know what was going on and who had been killed. I yelled again, "who killed someone?" I couldn't see any blood or signs of a struggle so I was even more confused.
Finally one of the guys looked up at me and yelled, "(expletive)SNAPE KILLED HIM!"
Snape? Inmates have all sorts of nicknames so I figured someone nicknamed Snape had killed another inmate. Part of me was so excited to see my first prison murder scene. "Snape, I said. Who did he kill?" That's when another inmate came out into the hallway, nearly in tears, and answered my question.. "Snape.. Snape killed Dumbledore!"
It took me a split second for my brain to fully process what I was being told but the light finally came on...This was the weekend of the Harry Potter Movie Marathon on USA network! I had overheard some guys talking about it earlier in the day and didn't consider that the entire prison would be glued to their TVs all weekend watching Harry, Hermione, and Ron take on the Dark Lord. But all of these guys were either too high or too tough to ever watch or read a series like Harry Potter on the outside were into it just like my kids had been years ago. It was nothing less than fascinating to see 180 felons cheering on a game of Quidditch.
Although I am sure there are some repeat offenders who were quietly cheering Lord Voldermort on-they didn't dare do it publicly-the boy with the scar on his forehead was just too easy to root for.
Random Thoughts
This week will mark six months of me being prisoner #179321 in the Colorado Department of Corrections. I can't believe that it's been that long! This past week will be a little different than any of my others in that it's just a little different than any of my others as I have a collection of random thoughts that I have been meaning to write down but haven't had the right blog topic to work them in, so here you go-
-My first two weeks in prison seemed as long as the next five and a half months.
-I have yet to sleep all the way through the night on a prison bed. The only times I have slept through the night in the past six months is when I have been on fires and sleeping under the stars.
-I finished my 50th book since being in here this week. Undaunted Courage by Stephen Ambrose is one of the top 5 best books that I have ever read.
-If I could go back 20 years, I would have found a way to fight fires in the summers. There are few things on earth that get my adrenaline going more than a fire. The physical and mental challenge are exhilarating.
-I am scared about being a felon and how that will affect my life once I am out.
-I have never loved or appreciated my wife Sallie more than I do now. In some crazy way, this whole ordeal has just made our love story that much better.
-I miss steak-good steak-so, so much.
-My kids are resilient. Sallie and I were so worried about how this would affect them. I know it's been hard on them but they have made me so proud. Their courage, attitudes, lack of embarrassment has been a miracle.
-As inmates, ironically enough, we get the best versions of each other in here. Most of the guys in this facility are here because of drugs- meth mainly. The absolute devastation that these drugs cause is unbelievable-unless you have witnessed it. I find myself having conversations with other inmates in here and thinking to myself, "how could this guy have committed such a terrible crime?" The answer-drugs. And for the most part, everyone in here is drug free-so I get the best version (in most cases) of them. Something their families and loved ones have not known for many, many years.
-Getting back into shape I'm in now was one of the hardest things I've done. I had forgotten how much of an impact physical health has on spiritual and mental health. I feel as good as I have felt in 10 years.
-You'd be surprised at how in a lot of cases, there are only 2 decisions difference between an inmate and the common citizen.
-God is good-I've never felt stronger about that, in my whole life than I do now.
-I know this makes me sound old-fashioned but I am convinced, more than ever, that our cell phones are destroying our minds. Between work and social media and the Internet, it's realistic to say I was spending 3-4 hours a day on my phone. It's now been six months since I last saw my cell phone and I can literally feel my brain coming back to life. I enjoy things like reading and writing again. My creativity is back in full swing. I don't have anxiety when I'm more than 3 feet from my phone. I feel like I have missed out on so much life going on around me. I read an awesome quote this week that I've sworn to commit to for the rest of my life-especially as it applies to my phone.
"Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least."
-Johann Goethe
-Sit down or go for a walk with someone you love and watch the sunrise or sunset. It's something that you take completely for granted until you do it for six months-alone.
-I can't wait for the day when its only Sallie performing strip searches of me. The "squough"is getting so redundant.
-I can't wait to be able to use real toothbrushes, utensils, and click pens again. Why can't we use them in here you ask?....Because they've all been used to kill people.
-I recently finished a religious book Sallie sent me called, The Peacegiver by James Ferrell. In terms of perspective on the Atonement of Jesus Christ, no other book has had such a profound impact on my view of that great act. It's a quick read, and in my opinion, is absolutely life changing.
-I am so grateful for so many things-exponentially more than when I came in here. It's one of the few positives that could ever come out of an experience like this.
-When I consider the love and support that my family and I have received from so many people during this unimaginably tough time in our lives-I cannot contain my emotions. I could write about the acts of kindness and the miracles that have come out of this and still not come close to capturing the correct magnitude. THANK YOU!
-Making the fire fighting team is a miracle that I am still trying to understand. In many ways, it saved my life.
-I miss my wife's cooking and the life where Top Ramen isn't the main course of everything.
-I miss good toilet paper-and not sharing a bathroom with 30 other dudes.
-Did I mention I miss the 3 s's? Steak, Sallie and s... in no particular order.
-I am heartbroken by the stories I hear of the situations that so many of my fellow inmates grew up in. If anything, it reminds me that I have absolutely no excuse for being in here.
-I miss fly-fishing. While we were on the 416 fire in Durango we would drive by fly fishermen in the river each day-that was prison at it's worst.
-Football season hasn't even started and yet I already miss coaching. I've coached my son Jack since he was 6 years old-I wanted one last season with him before high school. It breaks my heart to miss this season but I am grateful for the good men who have stepped up to coach him, support him and help him and his team. This includes his basketball family as well. We are blessed to have such good men take care of Jack for me while I can't. To them, I can never thank you enough.
-Things I'm addicted to that I wasn't before prison: Hot Cheetos, Welch's Fruit Snacks and peanut butter.
-I miss being able to go to Church-ALL THREE HOURS! Even I'm surprised by this :)
-I miss my dog Zeus.
-I miss date nights every weekend.
-I miss hanging out with my kids and listening to them laugh.
-I miss teasing them.
-I miss being a husband and a father in person.
-I miss free conversations-they cost $.12/minute in here.
-I miss traveling and interacting with our employees.
-I miss my friends and business associates.
-I miss my nieces and nephews and their parents; I miss my Goble and Stephens family.
-I miss kissing my wife whenever I want.
Thank you again to all who read the blog and follow our story!
Lastly.. 3 rules to live by:
1. Don't take things personal.
2. Be impeccable with your word.
3. Comparison is the thief of joy.
Brandon Stephens, Weld County Jail, Wood Group, Sentenced, 5 Years, Prison, NFL, DRDC, Rifle Correctional Center, Colorado Department of Corrections, Jail, Judge Quammen, Steve Wrenn, Weld County, Executive, Oil, Gas, White Collar, Wood, BYU, Masters Degree, Colorado State University, SWIFT, Firefighter, Wildland, Sawyer, Fire, Inmate, Brandon Stokey, Miracles, Centennial Community Correctional Center, Delta Correctional Center, DRDC, Denver Diagnostic and Reception Center, Felony, Sallie Stephens, Greeley Tribune, Judge Thomas Quammen, DA Steve Wrenn, Weld County Court, Oil & Gas,. Halfway House, Centennial Community Correction Center, CCTC, Felon, 416 Fire, Silver Creek Fire, Spring Fire, Cabin Lake Fire
Harry Potter - Lol! That was hilarious and I can totally see how that could be taken out of context with the crowd getting so upset by it.
ReplyDelete