Remember, you are not alone...

Remember you are not alone. The Savior has promised that He will not leave you comfortless. You also have family, friends, and leaders who are cheering you on.

~Elder Gary E. Stevenson

I am involved in around 50-60 conversations a day. By involved I mean both actively and passively. Being passively involved in a conversation is just a classy way for me to say that I am eavesdropping on a conversation that is so intriguing or educational that I simply cannot help myself. Some of these conversations involve other inmates, some involve guards and many of them are with myself (I know huh? it's a scary development for me as well). Anyway, out of these 50-60 conversations, I would classify about 4 of them as "normal, healthy conversations". The other 56 can be broken into a couple of different categories ranging from "slightly abnormal" to "I'm going to need counseling after hearing that". The creative, constant and unnecessary use of terrible language is like nothing I have ever heard. I would never call myself a prude when it comes to language but when it's relentless and in the volume, I despise it.

Now imagine taking all of these conversations and creative English and combining all of it into a single 10'x5' environment..aka the prison phone room. As seen in the movies, every prison in America has a phone room. The phone room consists of 5-7 old-school payphones hanging from the wall. If you were to stand at the opening of the room and listen to the individual conversations it would be like surfing cable channels on your TV at home...Lifetime Movie Network, Telemundo, Judge Judy, McMafia, Family Feud, Joel Osteen and even some expensively-trashy Pay-Per-View event..it's all here for the taking and all in one room. It's been so good to be able to have regular phone conversations with Sallie and my kids but trying to concentrate on your own conversation while in this room is like trying to focus on a single TV at Buffalo Wild Wings-nearly impossible. I'm constantly worried about my kids' overhearing some of my astute colleagues' conversations and even more worried about my kids' subsequent curiosity and follow-up questions.

I'm telling you all this so that I can properly establish the setting for one of the greatest and most spiritual experiences of my Family's life...

I have a standing call date with Sallie and the kids each night at 8:00. On February 10 (Saturday) things were abnormally off-schedule. For whatever reason, I didn't call Sallie at our usual 8:00 time, I knew she would be anxious and worried why I hadn't called, which of course had me anxious. It was 9:30 and the phone room was particularly noisy that night and it sounded like Telemundo and Family Feud had gone through an overnight corporate merger. There was an inmate who was particularly upset that his girlfriend had the nerve to contact his wife via Facebook to out their relationship. He was yelling in both English and Spanish.. I was hoping that by the time Sallie had picked up, he would have settled down...he hadn't, so as soon as she said hello, I politely asked him if he could keep it down. The other 3 inmates who were on the phone were glad I said something, he however, was not. So now he was glaring at me and still yelling at his girlfriend as I was trying to start talking to my wife.

Sallie immediately told me that we had a visitor at the house who wanted to speak with me. This wasn't anything new as we have had many people stop by the house to check on Sal and the kids so,  I was completely unprepared for the voice on the other end of the line.

"Brandon, how are you? This is Gary Stevenson."  I was so surprised to hear his voice that I really didn't respond right away. It had been a long couple of weeks for me and my family and to hear his voice through the phone immediately brought a feeling of peace to me that I have never felt. Not only did the Spirit fill my body, but it could be felt throughout the entire phone room- I couldn't hear a single conversation from any other inmate and homeboy wasn't glaring at me anymore (this could have been either Elder Stevenson's presence or the threatening glare I was now giving back).
At the same time, I could not believe that I was talking to Elder Stevenson.... from prison! I could have never imagined a more unlikely scenario. A part of me felt so ashamed and embarrassed but quickly I told myself if there was anyone who knew me and would not judge me, it was him. 

Some context for those of you who are not familiar with my Mormon faith....Gary Stevenson is an Apostle in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We believe we have a living Prophet on earth that leads our Church along with his Apostles. We refer to them by "Elder" vs Mr. if that makes sense. Elder Stevenson is one of the 12 Apostles, he is literally one of Christ's Apostles here on earth.  Along with our Prophet, President Russell M. Nelson. (Do not confuse us with the fundamentalist LDS church that have made news for marrying underage girls. THAT IS NOT US! We are Christians who believe that Jesus Christ is our Savior, you can learn more at www.lds.org if you care to know or understand more. We are not a cult, and I want to make that clear.....and be nice to those young men and women missionaries out there serving :))

Elder Stevenson and his wife Lesa had called Marlowe, Sallie's Dad to find out if they could fly in and visit with Sallie and the kids and go to church with them on Sunday. As it happened, Marlowe was in town to check on Sallie and the kids. He told Marlowe he had realized that Saturday afternoon that he happened to have a free Sunday.  He told us he spoke with Elder Ballard and decided that he would fly in and visit the family. As an Apostle, Sundays are without a doubt one of his busiest days, so the fact that he was taking what little free time he has to spend it with my family.... it was simply too overwhelming to consider.

Elder Stevenson and I spoke for about 10 minutes and had such an amazing conversation, one I will never forget and always cherish. Sallie's brother, Bouk picked him up from the airport and he met them at Jack's basketball game. He told me how proud I should be of Jack, as well as my 3 girls, Maggie, Navy and Elizabeth. He counseled me to read some specific scriptures, which I did and will continue to do. One in particular was D&C:121 and 122.

As we finished up the conversation, he asked me if it would be alright with me if he gave Sallie an Apostolic Blessing. He explained that by giving her this blessing, it would be as if he was laying his hands on each of our heads-including mine and the kids'. I am not a good enough writer to even try and describe the feelings and emotions that my heart felt as Elder Stevenson spoke to me. Here was an Apostle of God, asking me for permission to administer to my family in our living room. I thanked him and told him I would love nothing more than for Sallie to receive a blessing from him. The love and peace I felt, it sustains me to this day. The whole experience was incredibly sacred and I will leave it up to Sallie on how much she wants to share. But I will say this much, Elder Stevenson's blessing has affected our lives profoundly. I feel like things were possibly at a tipping point when he showed up at our house, the way that it affected all of us-including my children, can never be overstated.

My 14 year old, Navy wrote me the cutest note about the blessing that I thought was so fitting- "Dad, I actually listened to every word that he told us. Whenever you gave us blessings I never really paid attention but I paid attention to his and it was awesome!" Gotta love my Navy. One scripture that he shared with my family that has been a huge strength to us is 2Nephi 2:2- our afflictions will be consecrated for our gain.

Elder Stevenson had told Sal and Marlowe that he was planning on attending church with them. Sallie was relieved to tell him it was Stake Conference so that wasn't going to happen. Much to her dismay, she was going with him and he'd make sure there was a seat saved for her and the family. :)
I will tell you that Sal was an emotional wreck. She was so incredibly grateful that he was there, for the blessing he gave her, and for the love and support he wanted to give her and my family. Yet, she was so uncomfortable showing up at Stake Conference with him. (Stake Conference is a general meeting with all the LDS members and their congregations gathered for a 2 hour meeting, about 4,000 people not necessarily all there but still..)

She said this might just cause people to leave the church :) she was just so overwhelmed and felt completely unworthy of him showing up for her, for us. I understand how she felt, unfortunately my current living arrangements was the reason he was there, and we were overwhelmed with gratitude and complete humility.

I wish I could have heard what he said to the congregation, I have no doubt from the emails and letters from some that were there, that is was so full of love, compassion and support that you'd be hard pressed to find a dry eye in the building. He flat out told everyone he was there for The Stephens family.  It doesn't matter what your faith is, what you believe in or don't.....to have a man, let alone one who represents Christ himself, take the time to truly minister to the people is something Sal and I both intend to live up too and know it will take on more and more importance and impact on our children as they get older. What a gift and example he is. 

I am still overcome with emotion as I write this post. Elder Stevenson took the time to minister to my family at a time when we needed it so very much. As I think back to the New Testament and Christ's ministry, all we read about is Christ and his Apostles ministering to the sick and afflicted. It was an awesome testament to see Elder Stevenson doing the same thing here in our time.

As I went back to my room after the most surreal phone call I have ever had, I pulled out my scriptures and read through the sections Elder Stevenson told me to read. D&C 121 & 122 contain revelations from when the Prophet Joseph Smith was a prisoner in Liberty Jail. I could relate so closely to some of the questions that Joseph Smith was asking God in those verses.

The Prophet asks, "O God, where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth they hiding place? How long shall thy hand be stayed?"

And God's marvelous answer... "My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but for a small moment, and then if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes. Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands..And if thou should be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the very jaws of hell shall open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these thing shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?... Thy days are known, and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore, fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever."

As I read these scriptures I was overcome with a miraculous feeling of peace and hope that I had never before felt. I also knew that at that same moment an Apostle of God had his hands on my wife's head giving her, my children and me, an Apostolic Blessing. 

I was overcome by the moment and felt like I had to thank God for the miracle of the last couple of hours and repent for the times I questioned where He was, why the prayers of mine, Sal's and so many other's on our behalf had felt unanswered-for the times I felt abandoned, alone, had lost hope and my faith. He has been here, the whole time, and for the second time in as many weeks, as I knelt down in my prison cell to pray, I could no longer hold back the tears of gratitude, love, humility, comfort and hope...

Brandon Stephens, Weld County Jail, Wood Group, Sentenced, 5 Years, Prison, NFL, DRDC, Rifle Correctional Center, Colorado Department of Corrections, Jail, Judge Quammen, Steve Wrenn, Weld County, Executive, Oil, Gas, White Collar, Wood, BYU, Masters Degree, Colorado State University, SWIFT, Firefighter, Wildland, Sawyer, Fire, Inmate, Brandon Stokey, Miracles, Centennial Community Correctional Center, Delta Correctional Center, DRDC, Denver Diagnostic and Reception Center, Felony, Sallie Stephens, Greeley Tribune, Judge Thomas Quammen, DA Steve Wrenn, Weld County Court, Oil & Gas,. Halfway House, Centennial Community Correction Center, CCTC, Felon, 416 Fire, Silver Creek Fire, Spring Fire, Cabin Lake Fire, SWIFT Run, 1.5 miles, Fire, Fighter, Brandon Stokey, Running for my life, Elder Gary Stevenson, Quorum of the Twelve, Apostles,